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Be a Champion

Be a Champion

By Mary Verstraete, CCE President

Someone doubting their abilities evokes a common response–"I don't think I can do that," or "I'm not capable." Even though it may not be true, it's that person's reality and genuine belief. 

What can we do to change a doubting mindset? 

Be a champion for someone by "using your capacity to see the person's capacity" and acknowledge what is true about the person. 

Examples:
"I'm confident that you can perform at the level your boss is expecting of you. Susan, I've seen you in situations like this before, and you have an innate way of rising to whatever challenges are set before you."

"You've consistently shown your ability to find the win-win solution and what is beneficial for both sides; you don't compromise, and you work toward what's fair and principled."

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Whenever you communicate what is true, you help to instill confidence, develop accurate self-awareness, and generate a mind-set of true reality.

This week:

  • Be intentionally observant for abilities a person may be doubting
  • Communicate what you know to be true about that person's abilities
  • Celebrate that you helped someone to develop accurate-self-awareness
Notice Character Qualities!

Notice Character Qualities!

Mary Verstraete, PCC

Have you ever been the recipient of a comment that caused you to take notice of a particular characteristic about yourself. Example: "Your determination is exemplary." Or, "Your thoughtfulness is noticed by those around you."  Your response may have been "I guess I haven't given that much thought." Or, "Really, I guess I've never seen myself in that light." Responses like these are common. What makes this true?  

We don't expect positive comments and observations. The world is conditioned to observe the negative because of what scientists call the brain's "negativity bias," and therefore many people notice the bad qualities in others rather than the good ones.

Endorsing is the opposite of negativity and is a recognition of consistent character qualities that are demonstrated. It is appreciating and extending a message of "I believe in you, have an outstanding opinion of you, and hold you in high regard."

When we notice a positive character quality and then communicate that observation, the person has the opportunity to embrace, believe, and internalize that quality. There is no doubt that interactions and experiences have a profound impact on our beliefs and the way we think. From one's thinking, a person can embrace a behavior and be consistent in demonstrating the characteristic. 

Can you imagine the impact of endorsing–People living out what is true about themselves. More kindness, compassion, resourcefulness, wisdom–elements that make the world a better place.

As coaches we can contribute to a person's beliefs, be instrumental in replacing a false belief with accurate belief, which then influences one's behavior. 

Here is sample list of qualities that you can include in applying the skill of endorsing:

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How to endorse:

Sam, You consistently exhibit patience in challenging situations.

Melanie, you step up with creative initiative when something needs to be completed.

Your decisiveness helps our team focus and stay on track.

This week: 

  • Be intentionally observant for character qualities
  • Communicate that observation
  • Celebrate for a moment that you added to someone's belief that in turn, possibly changed a mindset, and enforced a character quality

 I couldn't be happier with the training. As a professional coach, I’m now involved in living my vision of being an agent for positive change in people's lives.

Alan Smith
CBMC Northland Area Associate Director